Applying for the position of your wedding date — and intending to be the only application you remember.
22 · Woodstock, GA · references enclosed
You listed four requirements. Most applicants will skim them. I treated them like a spec sheet.
You asked every applicant for their strongest argument. Here's mine: I'm the date that makes your night easier, funnier, and better-photographed — in that order.
I can hold a conversation with your college roommate, your boss, and the groom's grandfather back to back, no notes. I'm funny in the way that gets the whole table going, not the way that needs an apology later. I'm early to everything, I drive, I plan, and I'm polite to a degree that's been described as suspicious — that's the Canadian in me.
And yes, weddings happen to be my actual profession, so your venue is my home turf. But hire me for the company, not the certification.
— Jared
Born in Canada, raised in Georgia since I was four — so I say "sorry" and "y'all" in the same sentence. I'm 22 (23 any minute now), I lift or run every single day, and I'm outside every chance I get. I'll try any sport and be dangerous at it by the third attempt. I cook for real, and I can fix or build just about anything.
My friends would tell you I'm funny, responsible, and the kind of guy you bring home — their words, I'm just reporting them. Honestly? I'm looking for the real thing. But if this starts as one great wedding date, that's a pretty good first chapter.
Wakesurfing is the whole personality from May to September. I'll teach you — that's a standing offer.
If there's a trail with a jump on it within two hours of Atlanta, I've probably hit it. Sundays are for the mountains.
My idea of a perfect day off is a trail I haven't hiked yet and a sunset at the top. You're invited.
Cooking after the gym is the routine — real meals, not sad chicken and rice. Bring an appetite.
Lifting and long runs are the non-negotiables — it's the engine behind everything else on this page. Yes, I'll still share the dessert.
A side-by-side, in the interest of full transparency.
Selling points, in chronological order. This is what hiring me actually gets you.
Your posting identified no risks. I commissioned an independent audit to be sure. Findings: zero red flags, one (1) chest tattoo, and a Canadian upbringing — so worst case, I'm aggressively polite to your entire family.
You asked for the superior wedding date. The requirements are met, the terms are accepted, the references are willing, and the suit is already pressed. All that's left is your decision.
You're hired →